Have you ever tried going on a diet and ended up binging instead? Or maybe you have tried accomplishing something but ended up unsuccessful? What did you do after? Did you try to justify your actions by coming up with several reasons that detracted you from you goal? I suppose so.
It is extremely hard to admit that you are wrong, so you often make excuses. It's easier that way. You come up with "valid reasons" that justify your failure. Good for you, right? WRONG!
Committing to do things and not going through with them doesn't mean you can come up with creative excuses for not doing them right. It may feel good for a while, but in reality, you just don't have any excuses for failing to fulfill your responsibilities. In short, you failed. No excuses!
Now, suppose you get thrown into a situation that you didn't ask for in the first place. Suppose you're just not where you want to be at a certain moment. You go with the flow, follow the crowd, do what you're asked, then you fail. Your defense now becomes, "I didn't commit to this. I didn't even ask for this! I was forced to do this so I am not liable for making some mistakes." Does this excuse become valid now? Let's make this a little bit concrete. Say, your dad forces you to join the basketball team, to excel in sports. You go with the flow just to stop him from nagging you. You make a mistake during a crucial game that made your team lose. You then blame your dad saying, "This is not my fault! I didn't even want to do this!" Is this valid? I don't think so. The fact that you chose to do something, even if you felt that it wasn't within your control, doesn't give you the luxury of coming up with reasons and pointing blame to others. It was entirely your fault.
So, what now? What if you are indeed stuck in a situation you don't want to be in? Do you set up a back-up plan? Coming from a game theory perspective, this is a bad idea. It seems good since you can get out of it and follow what you really want to do. However, having a back-up usually mean that you're not living in the moment and you might be focusing too much of your energy on other things, ultimately leading you to your inevitable failure.
Whether you admit it or not, not liking what you are doing is just a terrible excuse! It's just something you say to make yourself feel better about the situation. At the end of the day, you're just lying to yourself and to everyone around you. You're already in that position, why not just do something about it and honor your commitments? Furthermore, if you hate what you're doing right now, just quit! Don't make the people around you, and even yourself, suffer.
Leaving on a brighter note, I found an apt art for this post. I guess instead of wallowing in excuses, you can just inspire others to do and keep moving forward. :)
|The Artist Manifesto by Jeff Goins and Mandy Thompson|
P.S. This was my thought for the day. It is a bittersweet realization after hearing someone reply/comment on a remark I made. Sad and harsh, but extremely needed. :)